31 days of a new normal {day 8} weakness

This post is part of a month-long series.  You can read the rest here.

I’m the oldest of three girls.  The third week of December will mark a) the 10 year anniversary of our wedding, b) the 1 year anniversary of my youngest sister’s wedding, and c) one month until the wedding of my middle sister.  No June brides in this family!Youngest and I gave Middle and her fiance a party tonight, and I’m still bouncing off the walls from all the love that was shown to them.  Okay, I’m bouncing off my mental walls, and my body is recovering. This post should really be 4,000 words about the awesomeness of friends and family, but I am doing a series about learning to deal with a chronic illness, so…

Why is it that I can “turn it on” when I have to? Especially when it involves other people, I can somehow dig down and find a reserve of energy and will that doesn’t seem to be there when I’m sitting alone at night in front of a pile of [insert school or home duty here.]

Even though I can think of possible medical explanations, it frustrates me that I can’t command my body or my mind — or the connection between the two — at all times.  It makes me feel weak.  I think it’s going to take a while to process this from (2 Corinthians 12) in a fresh way:

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

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6 thoughts on “31 days of a new normal {day 8} weakness

  1. Lauren,

    You have a beautiful family.

    I know it must be frustrating for you. I wish you well as you deal with this. I know the uncertainty can be hard on you too. Deal with one thing at a time.

    I will pray that you have wisdom as you wade through everything.

  2. As a person who suffered with this disease for years, and still does from time to time, I totally understand this frustration. For years all I could do each week was get up and play for church on Sunday, teach a homeschool group on Tuesday and then try to stay awake long enough to homeschool my own children the rest of the week. Some days it worked, other days just getting in the shower wore me out and sent me back to bed in terrible pain. I think the best thing to come out of that time was learning that God is in control…of everything! Even when I couldn’t stay awake long enough to teach my kids, God helped them to learn through friends, or reading on their own or whatever, but the goal was achieved without me a lot of the time. Kind of put my life in perspective. I may think everything depends on me, but it really doesn’t and just that thought has kept me from living life on the edge of destruction.

    • Wow. Thank you for sharing! That’s a powerful testimony to the goodness of God.

      You said you’re not suffering all the time – Have you found a treatment plan that works for you?

  3. This is a perfect scripture to match all our weaknesses and infirmities, including yours. God’s just amazing like that. *wink*

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